This pretty much sums me up. I've traveled extensively, known many diverse people and groups, read and studied exhaustively... And yet, always something was missing. I've always had a hole that has never been filled. A few times, I felt I was close... but always ended up disappointed. I am resigned that I will never know what it is I'm missing to be complete. And no, It's not god or Jesus! Been there, done that. If anything, made it worse.