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I think as long as we don’t shame spiral or run towards panic-babbling, silence actually has the capacity to develop deeper relationships.
Good news: Your attachment style is not permanent! Healthy relationships that weather seasons of rupture and repair, like partnerships with a kind and committed partner or long-term work with a relationally oriented therapist, can help us create an "earned secure attachment." Earned secure attachments can help us learn the feeling of secure attachment and grow the capacity to move towards it in other relationships.
Characterized by a fixation on healthy eating, orthorexia can be a deeply disruptive pattern of dysfunction in a person's daily living. Read on to learn more.
Life throws us stressors in different forms. Stress can range from new experiences that raise our blood pressure and biochemical responses to more sustained experiences like navigating unexpected life changes. If navigated well (through leaning on healthy relationships or using adaptive coping skills) not all stress is detrimental. However, if stress is intense and chronic, it can lead to a variety of lasting effects.
Quick-fix breakthroughs get glamorized in pop culture’s version of therapy and shape our expectations of how therapy will work for us, but in real life, change comes slowly.
When you’re new to therapy and aren’t really sure what therapy is supposed to feel like, it can be really confusing to try and figure out if a first session or initial consult went well – how to choose the right therapist or how to know if they’re the right fit. Read through my guide for advice!
In a culture where life is often lived digitally, mindfulness matters. Research shows that mindfulness physically changes our brain in ways that help learning, memory, and emotional regulation. Regular mindfulness practices also soothe anxiety, increase gratitude, and can improve relationships. This worksheet can be used as an easy end-of-the-day reflective exercise to allow you a few moments to slow down and process a bit of what your mind and body experienced during the day.
Right now, in this breath, you can draw in the exhale of the leaves around you and feel the warmth of your both capable and helpless hands spread to your chest as your heart marches into this moment one beat at a time.
Inspired by Kristin Neff on The Hidden Brain podcast, this sketchnote series visually translates her message on the significance of being kind to ourselves and how we can step into that practice. (3/3)
Inspired by Kristin Neff on The Hidden Brain podcast, this sketchnote series visually translates her message on the significance of being kind to ourselves and how we can step into that practice. (2/3)
Inspired by Kristin Neff on The Hidden Brain podcast, this sketchnote series visually translates her message on the significance of being kind to ourselves and how we can step into that practice. (1/3)
Being a whole, healthy, complex human means allowing desire to exist, honoring it, satisfying it in ways that are accessible and life-giving, and holding with care, and without shame, desires that remain unmet.
Pop-culture "wellness" often pathologizes desire. We are promised that if we can just ignore physical hunger, meet our own needs emotionally, and keep our sexual desire confined, we'll be okay and we won't have to suffer the affliction of desire. This lie is so engrained that most of us (particularly women) have swallowed it whole.
Kids who grow up in families where emotional needs are not validated and met often develop a deep sense of internal shame for having needs at all. Over time, to cope, many of these kids become adults with little or no capacity to experience their emotions. Click to read more on this topic!
Encontrar el equilibrio adecuado entre la exposición puede aliviar los síntomas de ansiedad.
Coping with anxiety is not a linear experience. Different symptoms or instances of anxiety may produce a different level of felt anxiety, which then signals our body and emotions to react to different degrees. Coping with anxiety is considered a spectrum because there are differing degrees of embracing symptoms of anxiety that can be helpful or unhelpful to a certain extent.
Recovery isn’t “getting rid” Of negative coping skills, it’s learning new skills. If you've avoided recovery because giving up the only-ways-you-know-to-survive feels overwhelming, know that the goal of good therapy isn't "stopping certain behaviors" it's SO. MUCH. MORE.
The interest in “scary stuff” is not a new phenomenon, but our culture’s love for scary content – proven through the enduring popularity of true crime podcasts, vampire lit, and every fall’s big new horror movie – is undeniable. Check out this sketchnote to see the psychology behind why we love a good scare!
Ruptures are not a sign that a relationship is in trouble- even frequent ruptures. Instead of looking at the frequency of conflict, therapists and relationship coaches are more apt to gauge a relationship based on: How partners engage with one another during a rupture, and How couples repair following a rupture. Click here to read more!
Needs that are ignored or unable to be met due to lack of resources don't go away- instead, they often become all consuming until there's no space for us to focus on tasks, plan, organize, parent, or take good care of ourselves.
Research indicates that untreated depression can cause the brain to shrink (notably, one area affected is the hippocampus- the part of the brain responsible for emotional regulation and complex decision making) Thankfully, brains are able create new neurons throughout our lifetimes, but if left untreated long term, degeneration may outpace our ability to generate new neurons- a capacity that reduces as we age.
If you or someone you know is showing signs, check in with your primary care doctor and inquire about referrals to a RAISE program, an early intervention program active in the vast majority of US states.
Magical thinking is a normal phase in childhood in which we think that our thoughts – or totally random, unrelated events – can change the future. Lots of us hang onto just a bit of this magical thinking as we move into adulthood and that’s not necessarily a bad thing (confession: I’m calling myself out a bit on coffee mug magic!).
An intentionally messy visual about the opposite: maladaptive over-control (sometimes called maladaptive perfectionism). We all love doing things well. “Getting it right” earns us praise and minimizes negative consequences. But what if our existence becomes more and more wrapped up in getting *everything* right?
Most of the life stories we encounter through fiction, movies, and short-format biographies follow narrative development that 99.9% of us can't relate to. In real life, #setbacks are common - actually they are an essential part of growth.